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Trump Grooms Byron, WY Officer to Fill Mattis Vacancy

Byron, WY

Huge news from our Big Horn County affiliate: in his search for the perfect blend of patriotism, justice, battle acumen, and traffic control, President Donald J Trump may look to humble Byron, WY for his permanent appointment of Secretary of Defense. After the shocking news of General Mattis stepping down from the position, The President has wasted no time in seeking a qualified replacement. Trump took to Twitter,

'One of the best. Very good. Huge. Scoot through town at 30 miles per hour and he's fair, friendly, even waves. Push it to 31 miles per hour, and you're toast. I'll need a guy like this in Iran.'

While the community understands the President may not choose their constable to fill the Secretary Seat, it has been an exciting process for them. And, although not yet substantiated, there is much ado about General Mattis applying for the Byron Officer position, should it become available. More from The Telegraph as the story develops.


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