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DRAW RESULTS: Local Big Game Reminds Wyoming Hunters, 'All Lives Matter.'

Wyoming, USA

June 18th can mean one of two things for a large majority of Wyoming residents- one is that the world is a dumpster fire, and the other is, of course, Draw Results Day! That's right! The sportsman's equivalent of Christmas, their birthday, and an episode of Meat Eater, all in one. A day that can make or break a person's aspirations for the remainder of the year. A day that allows for triumphant celebration or utter heartbreak. A day where a person can gloat on Facebook or never logs in. That day is today, Telegraphers. And may that day be treating you well.

Perhaps, less than thrilled about June 18th, The Telegraph was able to catch up with a deer who was already drunk by 10AM. Sharing his thoughts on the matter with slurred words and a cigarette he had smoked to the butt 30 minutes earlier, the deer said,

'It's just not fair. These basic b*tches have spent the past three weeks hashtagging 'All Lives Matter' across Facebook like a Russian spam bot and now they're plotting my death like a Tom Clancy novel. Hypocrites. Oh, and hunting from a four wheeler is for chumps.'

Interesting to say the least, and his point about the four wheelers is a pretty good one.

Happy Hunting, dear Wyoming!

  • The Telegraph

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