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Yellowstone Announces New Park for Reckless Idiots: YOLOstone


Yellowstone National Park


Leaves are turning and tours are leaving- such is the cycle of another successful tourist season in our beloved Yellowstone National Park. Solid visitor numbers confirm 2021 was an encouraging year for the park, COVID be damned. With the large number of normal, law-abiding tourists, statistics also show a steady ratio of idiots are certain to follow. And follow they did.

Determined to make the best out of the worst, a special panel put their heads together on a plan to keep normal visitors in the park, and draw those whom seek injury and lawlessness to a new, more appropriate venue. Meet YOLOstone.

'YOLOstone has everything an idiot would want for their vacation: bears to taunt, bison to ride, walkways to ignore...only in a new area where they won't be bothered by the normal folks who just want to take pictures and buy expensive souvenirs.'

Park officials are ecstatic, and may even make YOLOstone a new observation point for normal people who have the curious desire to see a person gored. I mean, who hasn't caught themselves watching a few too many YouTube videos of tourists being gored?

Exactly. See you at the YOLOstone observatory, peeps. Here's to 2022!


-The Telegraph

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