Ralston, WY
***Reader Discretion Advised***
Big news on the literary front from right here in the Big Horn Basin. A mysterious author who goes by the pen name, E. L. Maltnasty has taken our prudent community by storm after announcing the release his haughty farming memoir, '50 Shades of Grain.' The adult-themed publication is a collection of short stories involving the naughtier side of raising grain in Wyoming. The following excerpt, in particular, had our review team blushing:
'I Throttled my Gleaner through acres of Moravian 69, a sassy two-row variety. The blonde stalks needed a real good threshing, and I was just the guy. Chaff was everywhere. Those golden kernels were practically malting themselves....'
Too hot for TV. Too hot for The Telegraph. That's all for now, puritans.