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Park County Yams Anxious to be Cooked, Thrown Directly in Trash


Park County, WY


Happy Thanksgiving, you beautiful people! It's here. Thanksgiving. And we all have an insane amount of things and experiences to be thankful for. Some cliché, some not, but meaningful all the same.

Families will gather to break bread today, and one thing is almost universally guaranteed: that candied yams will only be prepared to take up buffet space, and then be thrown directly in the garbage can.

Yep. That endearing tradition of putting a ton of butter and marshmallows on the least popular tuber of all time. Baking it. Worrying and arguing about burning the marshmallows. Placing the dish on the table. Staring at it in disgust. Poking at the congealed mass once its at room temperature. Then throwing it away quicker than bad eggs. Makes our heart sing.

Said one can of yams to Telegraph reporters, this very morning,

'Like my father, my father's father, I can't wait to be blerched out in a foil pan, have six sticks of butter sliced on me, then enough brown sugar and marshmallows thrown on top to give a rhino type 2 diabetes. And the best part? Going from the oven to the garbage. YESSSS!'

A tip o' the cap to yams everywhere on this most thankful of days. And to Cranberries-who are just like yams, only with terrible attitudes. Gross.


Happy Thanksgiving, Telegraphers!

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